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Who I am as a filmaker.

A bit about me

I am a feminist filmmaker and I work, mainly with women, to craft their personal stories into aesthetic, intimate, filmic documentaries. I call the women who share their stories with me in front of the camera  - Storytellers. 

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I am a Trinidadian woman who was born in Tanzania, raised in Trinidad and university-educated in the UK. My father is Trinidadian and my mother British. I have also lived and worked in Peru, Egypt, Kenya and Myanmar. Often feeling an outsider and establishing relationships in unfamiliar cultures, I have learned to establish relationships quickly. 

 

My strength is character-driven stories that explore the interface between the protagonist's inner world and the world outside.

 

My openness, willingness to laugh at myself as the outsider in the room and my ability to foster camaraderie allow me to quickly bridge what might present as a cultural chasm with Storytellers.

 

My films cover a range of emotions and issues from natural childbirth and female circumcision to menopause and disability access.

Photo: Seif Eldeeb

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Photo: Jade Rodriguez

A bit about my journey

I worked in the field of development for 20+ years (with non-governmental and civil society organisations), with degrees in Ecology (MSc) and Environment & Development (MSc). Frustrated that lived experiences were not being effectively included in developmental projects and programmes I wanted to learn how to tell those stories in a non-extractive manner. 

 

Pursuing a degree in Documentary by Practice (MA) gave me the tools to place otherwise marginalised voices at the centre of the story with honesty and integrity. Ethical filmmaking is an empowering tool for those who want to tell their stories and for the organisations that work to support them. 

 

I aim to reposition Storytellers as complex and nuanced human beings in their own eyes and those of society. I like to think that my films capture genuine moments that speak to the heart of human experience ultimately shifting dominant negative narratives.

My work

My goal is that through my process Storytellers are empowered and that some aspect of their human agency and resilience is conveyed through films which disrupt the status quo.  

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I create an arena in which the Storyteller feels in control of telling her story and comfortable. With this comes the responsibility to ensure the Storyteller remains safe throughout and beyond the production process. Becky, who bravely shares her story in the film of the same name said this of her experience of our journey together:

... what I experienced telling my story in front of the camera was not just catharsis, it was empowerment... If you have a story, Nicola will let you tell it the way you want it told. She said to me over and over, “This is your story.” and when I watched the final product, it was my story."

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Becky from the film of her story, Becky

I edit to capture the essence of the Storyteller’s lived experience of events and their emotions. Rather than creating a format that the Storyteller has to fit I believe Storytellers own their stories and our filmmaking is a collaboration. I show them the sensitivity they deserve and I treat them with dignity and respect. I ensure the Storytellers have agency in the process from start to end. 

Using these tools to give viewers 'permission' to share and to feel part of a community is effective in healing and creating change.

For further details on my filmmaking process you can view this video. In it I deliver a paper on Black Women, Feminism and Ethical Film Production at a conference hosted by Goldsmith's, University of London. The conference was called, Ain’t I a Woman? : The “Black Woman” in Historical and Contemporary Context. 

   My guiding principles

  • I acknowledge the Storyteller I am collaborating with is the owner of their story and I treat them with the dignity and respect they deserve. 

 

  • As a filmmaker I am usually entering the Storyteller's world and I try to be conscious of my privileges and differences in our interactions. I am often the Other.

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  • I make it clear to the Storyteller that during filming we are engaging in a conversation and that they can stop at any time, refuse to answer certain questions and ask for aspects of their story not to be used in the final film.

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  • When I work with organisations I ascertain that they prioritise the Storyteller's well-being over the story itself rather than their own agenda.

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  • Storytellers view the film of their story and their feedback is incorporated into the final edit. Anything they are uncomfortable with is changed or removed from the film. Yes, there have been deletions I have had to make that have made me wince!

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  • I continuously re-assess and improve my filmmaking process based on feedback from Storytellers/Support organisations in an attempt to make films ethically.  

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  • These help create an arena in which we can connect respectfully and enjoy the process.

"A brave, brilliant, tragic, horrific, unexpectedly hilarious, superbly succinct short film on not only the taboo subject of FGM but of a woman's relationship and understanding of her vagina". 

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Felicity Beckett and Kavita Puri, Judges WOFFF2020

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